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„Coaching moves, yes“
You say: coaching moves. What do you mean exactly?
My experiences with coaching are intensive. Coaching moves – whether I am coaching my
clients or am coachee myself. In my experience I am in the same situation like my clients
with my own topics and issues - which I have of course. Being involved myself I am very close
to the problem and appreciate the professional distance and solution orientated questions
of my own coach. Coaching is always about solutions and different angles, perspectives. To
focus on the problem(s) or worry about things causes desperation, paralysis or stiffness.
Familiy, friends or mates are mostly asked too much of, when people have an urgent need
to solve a personal problem or business challenge. They listen. They give advice like “Do this...
or „Have you ever tried…?“ Or they say: „Keep cool, you can cope with it!” But everyone
needs own, individual solutions. What works for you must not necessarily work for me - it can
be even the worst way to handle a situation. Professional coaching always does without
patterns or stereotypes. It also does without “knowledge of what is best for the coachee”.
Unfortunately you find that pattern in many books. There you read “You must” oder
“you should” or “you may not”... Who wants to know that? For me it is important to stimulate
my own responsibility and support that force of mine. My conception of direction is about that.
I am the director in my own life. I am responsible for all that is going on at my life’s set.
I choose the genre, I influence the dialogues, the actors, the tone, the light and the balance of all.
„Coaching moves“ also means that it moves you out of your comfortable zone. This zone is the
area of our lazyness and fear of risks. What we have been doing all the time has brought the
same results. Being coached or after a coaching process I am all of a sudden outside this zone.
I let go of the old, stuck or dead.
Is there a story, a metaphor?
(laughs) Yes, there is. There are quite a few stories to be honest. About fleas, little circus
elephants and rats. I like this best: the rat in the labyrinth. A rat runs through a wooden
labyrinth again and again. At the end of the way lies a piece of cheese. After a while the rat
finds it very fast. Then the labyrinth is removed. The piece of cheese is reachable in a direct
approach. And what does the rat? Exactly! It goes the old way voluntarily. It looks like it
is still captured in the wooden labyrinth. That does look funny. And we act like that as well when
we move through our life. We accept borders because we have got used to them so much.
Do you know borders as well in your own life?
(laughs again) Sure, I am a human being with normal, everyday life issues. I have dogmas,
guiding me into wrong directions. Coaching helps me and awareness does. I am consciously
listening to my own thoughts and to my own words. I am convinced that thoughts become
things. My favorite example are the Wright-brothers and their dream of flying planes. We
all know what happened to their dream and vision.
Aha, another fan of „Everything is possible“... Mrs. Heinzelmann, do you send wishes
to the universe as well?!
Well, there is almost always more possible. Dissatisfaction or suffering are signs for
a need of change. Everything depends on my focus. When I am discontented there are two
possibilities: I can redefine my parameters for satisfaction which for example means to be
be satisfied with less or I change those parameters myself. Well, I can also complain about
my bad situation. Some people like that option best. A person that chooses the way and
process of coaching has made the first decision for change and against selfpity. That
is the first step. Then everything is in motion.
You have some questions, too? I am looking forward to your mail or phone-call
under +49 30 21 91 85 50.
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